Triangle Model
I found this prompt a bit difficult to my own experiences. I feel that I have not encountered many situations like this, as I do not have much experience in the work place with this idea. I tried to think of an example, but I think this addresses this model in a more indirect way.
When I was in high school, I was involved with the Youth Running Program. Members of the high school team mentored elementary school students with running track. I think this looked great for the school district, as many places did not offer track opportunities to children so young. It was definitely a good experience for me, as I was able to actually teach about running, something I genuinely enjoy. Also, it was good for the kids, as they learned something new, and good for the parents: they have something to brag about for their children. Throughout my time as a mentor, I encountered many competitive parents who wanted their kids to be the best at track. They were extremely competitive about their kids even when they were so young, which really was surprising for me.
As a mentor, I truly did not even think about the competition between the kids when we did our buddy run (one high school student would run a 5k with an elementary school student). I saw it as a relaxing way for me to run, something I really did not have the opportunity to do on my team, as we were constantly training for races. Clearly, the parents saw it as a way for their kids to get ahead. Perhaps, their performance would demonstrate their capabilities in the future. I know many of the kids mentioned they were involved with multiple sports at a pretty intense level given their age. As for the coaches, I think they saw it as a way to demonstrate to the community that they actually cared about being track coaches; it was not just a paid job. By being more involved with the recreational department, they were finally putting their name into the local town news, which was not happening before. Soccer and basketball were the main sports for younger kids.
With these differing views and motivations to be a part of this model involving the Youth Running Program, I think it impacted how the program was run. In the beginning, I know I saw it as a more relaxing activity, and felt that my main goal was to be a friend to the kids. However, after parents would individually talk with me after our sessions, I felt compelled to act more like a coach. Our coaches in charge of the program changed our general routine, and it became more similar to our varsity practices. Warm-ups, some form of a workout, and a cool-down became the norm.
I know that the coaches were not a fan of this new style. They also wanted it to be a fun experience, and after all, they were just kids. In my personal opinion, sports should not be that competitive and cut-throat at a young age. I think it is a time to figure out what sports or activities you actually enjoy, if any.
However, I can see why the coaches changed the program: they obviously want it to be successful and attract members. If the parents see it as a waste of time or not what they think is a good time investment for their kids, the membership rates will drop. It will reflect negatively on the program as a whole. Therefore, the coaches adhered to the potential customers' needs, which I think is a generally common practice.
At the same time, I do not think I personally like that. As I mentioned, this is not really a business that needs to create huge revenue, and based on the data, this program did not alter track and cross-country participation by anything significant in recent years. I think this ties into our personal reputation, and how we feel the need to adhere to others' needs if we think it may negatively reflect on ourselves. This comes at a price: certain services no longer accomplish what their goal was. The coaches felt tension between the parents when their program was not what they wanted. None of the coaches attempted to explain to the parents why they were doing it this way, as they told me they thought the point was very clear.
Given all of this, I truly think the kids would enjoy running more if they could see it as a more leisure activity. I know that being competitive and improving is important, but as I mentioned, it is important to see whatever hobby you have as fun. I think that a lot of our societal norms push us to really focus on some sport or hobby and be amazing at it. Sometimes we neglect to realize if we actually like it or not. I think this is where the triangle model fails, and creates this hatred towards what we are supposed to do for fun.
When I was in high school, I was involved with the Youth Running Program. Members of the high school team mentored elementary school students with running track. I think this looked great for the school district, as many places did not offer track opportunities to children so young. It was definitely a good experience for me, as I was able to actually teach about running, something I genuinely enjoy. Also, it was good for the kids, as they learned something new, and good for the parents: they have something to brag about for their children. Throughout my time as a mentor, I encountered many competitive parents who wanted their kids to be the best at track. They were extremely competitive about their kids even when they were so young, which really was surprising for me.
As a mentor, I truly did not even think about the competition between the kids when we did our buddy run (one high school student would run a 5k with an elementary school student). I saw it as a relaxing way for me to run, something I really did not have the opportunity to do on my team, as we were constantly training for races. Clearly, the parents saw it as a way for their kids to get ahead. Perhaps, their performance would demonstrate their capabilities in the future. I know many of the kids mentioned they were involved with multiple sports at a pretty intense level given their age. As for the coaches, I think they saw it as a way to demonstrate to the community that they actually cared about being track coaches; it was not just a paid job. By being more involved with the recreational department, they were finally putting their name into the local town news, which was not happening before. Soccer and basketball were the main sports for younger kids.
With these differing views and motivations to be a part of this model involving the Youth Running Program, I think it impacted how the program was run. In the beginning, I know I saw it as a more relaxing activity, and felt that my main goal was to be a friend to the kids. However, after parents would individually talk with me after our sessions, I felt compelled to act more like a coach. Our coaches in charge of the program changed our general routine, and it became more similar to our varsity practices. Warm-ups, some form of a workout, and a cool-down became the norm.
I know that the coaches were not a fan of this new style. They also wanted it to be a fun experience, and after all, they were just kids. In my personal opinion, sports should not be that competitive and cut-throat at a young age. I think it is a time to figure out what sports or activities you actually enjoy, if any.
However, I can see why the coaches changed the program: they obviously want it to be successful and attract members. If the parents see it as a waste of time or not what they think is a good time investment for their kids, the membership rates will drop. It will reflect negatively on the program as a whole. Therefore, the coaches adhered to the potential customers' needs, which I think is a generally common practice.
At the same time, I do not think I personally like that. As I mentioned, this is not really a business that needs to create huge revenue, and based on the data, this program did not alter track and cross-country participation by anything significant in recent years. I think this ties into our personal reputation, and how we feel the need to adhere to others' needs if we think it may negatively reflect on ourselves. This comes at a price: certain services no longer accomplish what their goal was. The coaches felt tension between the parents when their program was not what they wanted. None of the coaches attempted to explain to the parents why they were doing it this way, as they told me they thought the point was very clear.
Given all of this, I truly think the kids would enjoy running more if they could see it as a more leisure activity. I know that being competitive and improving is important, but as I mentioned, it is important to see whatever hobby you have as fun. I think that a lot of our societal norms push us to really focus on some sport or hobby and be amazing at it. Sometimes we neglect to realize if we actually like it or not. I think this is where the triangle model fails, and creates this hatred towards what we are supposed to do for fun.
On the general theme that parents push their kids now more than did a generation ago, in school as well as in sports, is probably a cultural thing to grapple with. As you suggest, much of the consequence is negative, putting pressure on kids too early in their lives. Further, it takes the ability to make choices away from the kids - the parents are making them on their behalf. I believe this is unfortunate but also that it is the reality.
ReplyDeleteSo, specifically in regard to running, you might have written about your own development on these lines. Did you get any coaching as a kid? If not, how did you develop? That contrast would have helped this post some.
Also, you should make explicit the triangle. In this case I'm unclear whether the parents acted as a group and put pressure on the coaches to make this program more rigorous. Of did each set of parents act on their own, just for their own kid. Finally, you should also indicate if the kid you supervised expressed a preference one way or the other. If the kid wanted the same thing as the parents did, there is not really a triangle here. But kids might not be comfortable saying what they wanted was not what their parents wanted. So that part would need some finesse.
Yes, putting pressure on kids has a lot of negative effects, but I think it is pretty normal in our society today. It is hard to find what actually brings happiness.
DeleteWhen it comes to running, I never really ran until freshmen year of high school. I was involved with sports, mainly soccer and tennis, but I would say it was much more relaxing than what these kids' schedules seemed like. For soccer, I was involved with a club team, and the main reason I was involved with it was because my brother was into soccer. When I was in elementary school, I think I really enjoyed playing soccer and the aspect of a team sport. However, I remember one day I played tennis for fun and really enjoyed it, and when I told my parents I wanted to play tennis, they were open to it. I quit soccer and joined a tennis class that met 3 times a week when I was in middle school. I am grateful that my parents did not push me to continue playing soccer, especially given that I had invested a lot of money and time into it. In contrast, I think that some parents today would not agree with this decision; if I was a decent soccer player at a young age, I did have potential as an athlete in the future.
Furthermore, I joined the winter track team just because my gym teacher told me I had a lot of potential as a distance runner my freshman year of high school, and I truly fell in love with running and quit tennis. Again, this could be seen as a waste of time and money in tennis, especially since racquets and tennis lessons are quite expensive. However, I am grateful that my parents did not really question my choice. I knew that I loved running more than any other sport I had done before, and I am so grateful that I never had someone telling me what I should do in my leisure time. The fact that I was able to start running at age 14 and have it be my main activity is something a lot of kids do not get today. I think that this cut-throat environment prevents children from finding their true passion, and arguably, what they are best at. I do not think we need to know our hobbies, college majors, or things of that sort at a young age. It is nearly impossible to know what interests you when you are barely exposed to anything of that sort.
For the triangle, I think that majority of the parents as a whole put pressure on the coaches to make it a more rigorous program. Additionally, they put pressure on the kids to be the best athletes or runners. In this way, a triangle can be seen as how the adults' pressure on coaches and kids resulted in different results. The coaches simply made it a more intense program to keep business. The kids suffered the consequences of not running in a fun environment. Given the few kids I was close with, I knew they did not really want what their parents wanted. They expressed negative sentiment towards a lot activities they were forced to participate in, including extra math classes, running, piano lessons, and basketball. Given the few times I saw the kids interacting with their parents, I really only saw respect, which is understandable. I can imagine it being difficult to talk back to your parents, especially at such a young age. This triangle of how the parents' intentions resulted in negative impact on the program and kids overall lifestyle demonstrates how this competitive environment really prevents kids from obtaining a proper childhood.